Enjoying a branch activity with Ramsey.  We had a Branch Rice Bowl with Hawaiian Haystacks. Yum Yum!

Ramsey attempting to take pictures of us in a taxi. Some worked better than others.

Wearing a shirt my mother wore when she was pregnant with me. =)

My pregnancy hormones are acting up again.

I’ve been thinking about the baby and how excited I am to see him/her. Sometimes I feel choked up just thinking about it. I want to hold my baby in my arms so bad it hurts. I could never before imagine how much love I would have for this little baby already.

Sometimes, when I see my abdomen poke out where the hands should be, I kind of the hold the spot so I can hold my baby’s hand. If I could reach far enough, I would kiss my belly but since I can’t, I have Ramsey do it for me.

I have to remind myself I just have two weeks left…but the closer it gets to my due date, the more I can’t hold back my emotions.

“Baby, mommy’s here. She loves you so much! And can’t wait to breathe in your newborn baby smell, and give you kisses all over!”

I will try to be patient but I’m just too darn excited! Ack!

The day I rode an elephant, I found out I was pregnant. I remember thinking it was really weird that I had to pee so much. As the elephant jostled my bladder, I knew something felt different. That night while in bed with Ramsey in our hotel room in Thailand, I told him I thought I might be pregnant. I looked at my ipod that has a handy iPeriod app and noticed my last period was August 26th. Hmmm, that’s odd. Why hadn’t I marked down a period for September? It was already October. Then it clicked. Could I be pregnant? The more I thought about it, the more sure I was. My period is never late. I didn’t actually take a pregnancy test until I got to Bangkok two days later, but the day I rode an elephant, I just knew I was pregnant. I went to bed that night excited and had a difficult time sleeping.

And so…elephants are very special to me. They remind me of that special day and the thrilling and lovely feeling of realizing I was pregnant. I will cherish that moment forever.

Recently a few women from my church threw me an elephant-themed baby shower. I felt very loved.

I had been so excited for weeks and then the actual day of the shower, I felt a bit unwell. I tried to hide the sickness but I felt like I was burning up. My luck. But all in all, I still had a great time.

I got a couple gifts but about 17 women donated money. That was pretty sweet. I’m going to use it to buy my electric double breast pump. No matter what, even though I’ll be going back to a 40 hour work week in August, my child will have its liquid gold!

Here are some pictures from the shower:

The relief society’s 8 year old daughter made these out of felt. She also came up with how to display them. So impressed!

Heather sewed me two elephant boppy covers.

My first pair of knitted booties courtesy of Heather!

Heather also knows that I have an obsession for all things “duckies” when it comes to baby gear. She made some pajamas. =)

Josette made a picture of an elephant out of chalk for my elephant-themed nursery. So impressed!

It was a fun evening of playing games and bonding as sisters. I’m happy for all those who could make it. Little peanut and I felt very loved. =)

To celebrate Korea’s Children’s Day or Parents’ Day, I’m still not quite sure which one we were celebrating, my boss asked Byron and I to plan the games. Byron had a genius idea to offer community service hours to the high-schoolers. So we both kind of sat back and delegated all the work. It was pretty sweet. And everyone seemed to have a lot of fun.

Here are some pictures of the event. It was fun to see the parents of the children I’ve been teaching all year.

Wednesday morning I had a prenatal visit. They hooked me up to the Electronic Fetal Monitor (EFM) like they’ve done the past two times. According to the Chinese doctors, a baby’s normal heart rate should be between 120-160. (Although multiple internet resources reveal 110-160). I’m pretty sure my baby was having a slumber because it was between 110-120 for the 25 minutes I was being monitored. The night previous, my baby was having a dance party inside of me and moving more than I’ve ever felt it move before. It must have been pretty tired from all the hustle and bustle and decided not to move much during my appointment. Because I had failed the test, they wanted me to come back during lunch. I told them that wasn’t possible since I had to work and my lunch break wasn’t very long. After yelling at me that my baby was more important than work, we somehow compromised that I would come back at 3:30 which was near to when my work day ends.

At 3:30 I get strapped to the machine again. Having eaten some snacks, I hoped the baby would put on a good show. Unfortunately, baby had other plans and took an afternoon nap. Once again, I failed the test and the baby’s heart rate fell under 120 consistently.

The doctor then ordered I get an ultrasound. The ultrasound appeared normal so I wasn’t worried about it too much.

However, the doctor insisted I stay in the hospital for 3 days to be monitored. She was afraid that the low heart rate meant the baby wasn’t getting enough oxygen and that it could be a symptom of an underlying heart problem. She said that if the baby’s heart rate stayed under 120 for the next three days, they would have to deliver the baby immediately.

I still wasn’t too concerned at this point until said doctor starts being a drama queen. When I ask if I could go back and forth to do the tests since my work was only 5 minutes away, she started yelling at me about what was more important my job or my baby. When I said “Fine, I will call my boss but let me go home and get some clothes” she said absolutely not. I couldn’t leave the hospital. I told her, I’m pretty sure my baby would be fine the duration it took to go home and back. Then she starts trying to scare me about my baby possibly dying in my womb while I’m in mid-transit. “Your baby could have a heart problem!” Of course, when she puts it so bluntly, it prayed on my fears. Who wants to hear such things?

Unfortunately I left my phone at work and after much persuasion she allowed me to return to work to retrieve it but still didn’t allow me to go home. As I was entering the school I saw my Korean boss and started to explain the problem about not being able to work the next day. Because her English isn’t very good and we didn’t have access to the translator when she kept probing about why I wouldn’t be at work, I couldn’t figure out how to explain why I had to be hospitalized. She wouldn’t be able to understand words like heart-rate, oxygen, monitoring etc…so I finally pointed to my heart and said “baby maybe heart problem.” My boss who normally has a look like she’s ready for the kill, actually melted a bit and put her hand on my shoulder and I couldn’t help but become emotional. It’s kind of a natural reflex my body produces when people feel sorry for me. As I left her, I realized that now this information that most likely wasn’t valid would spread like wild-fire across the office. Oh goodness. Ramsey said it might not be a bad thing that she thinks it’s worse than it is, because now she won’t be so demanding of me and stress me out so much. We’ll see. But I don’t like causing unnecessary sympathy and drama.

I decided to call my friend Heather since I was supposed to come to her house the next night and I wouldn’t have access to the internet to inform her. As I was telling her the situation, she told me the same thing happened to her. She said she signed a liability release form and they let her go home. Knowing that her baby failed those exact tests made me feel comforted because her baby came out perfectly healthy.

I took the test later that evening and voila passed! Excited, I asked the doctor if I could go home. She refused, saying that because I had failed twice in one day, I must be monitored for 3 days-hospital policy. I asked them if I could have a liability release form and they said I could but I would also have to waive my rights to deliver at this hospital. The doctor told me bluntly, if I didn’t follow their policies, I could not use their facilities.

The first night I was restless. Mosquitoes devoured my blood. I woke up every 20 minutes or so to a buzzing in my ear. Paranoid that they were eating me, I couldn’t sleep. And then the nurse would wake me up every 2 hours to monitor the baby’s heart-rate. Normal each time.

The baby’s heart rate ranged from 120-130 mostly which was enough to pass the test. After passing the morning test, I tried my luck and asked multiple doctors if I could leave promising them I would come back and forth between work since it was only 5 minutes away. Once again they refused usually accompanied by yelling at me for my recklessness.

Since Ramsey had to work. I felt so alone. Thankfully Shizhang’s mother came and brought me food and ended up talking to me for one and half hours. It was nice to have the company but after she left I was so exhausted. I hadn’t spoken Chinese for that long straight in a while. I took a really long nap and actually got some sleep.

Since there was no internet in the rooms, I watched 3 movies on my laptop. The first one was about this South African poet who wrote about apartheid. Basically the movie follows her crazy life which ultimately ends in suicide. True Story. Then the next movie was about this college student who corresponded with John Wayne Gacy to try to get in the mind of the serial killer and extract information from him months before his sentenced death so that he could write his term paper. True story. And the third one was a French film called “Intouchables” about this paralyzed man and his caregiver who have a special relationship. Another true story. That was a bit more uplifting then the other two.

I also finished the book, “Hypnobirthing” which Heather loaned me.

At this point, I was getting restless. I felt like I was in prison. I couldn’t wait til Ramsey would come. His class ended at 9:00 PM and if I just couldn’t wait until he showered and taxied over. At about 10:20 PM he called to check up on me. I thought he was coming and was excited all day. He said he wasn’t planning on it since he had to wake up at 6 am to work. I think he could hear I was starting to cry a bit over the phone. He asked if I wanted him to come over and stay the night.  Just as I was about to say “no, no no, it’s ok,” in a little voice, I said, “yes.” I needed him. It’s been a long time since I’ve slept alone. I knew this would be an inconvenience for him, but I justified it to myself saying, that one night of no sleep couldn’t hurt too much. I’m not always the most selfless person. I’m working on it.

All this experience left me with was probably high blood pressure and stress. Hearing screaming babies every hour or so was unnerving. I have no idea why the screams of babies got to me but they just did. And also the fact the doctors would never listen to anything I would say, made me feel unnerved. I started dreading my labor experience. What if the doctors insisted on inducing me or releasing my water, or giving me a c-section? How would I fight them? When I told these concerns to Shizhang’s mother, hoping for sympathy she simply said, “Of course doctors know best.” When I told her I wanted to wait 3 minutes until the umbilical cord was cut because I’ve read research online about that being beneficial to the baby, she said the doctors would surely not honor that request since it was essential to get the placenta out. Everything I said, she responded saying “doctor knows best.”

The thing is Chinese doctors are over-paranoid and I’m afraid they’ll hook me up to all sorts of monitors and I will be unable to move into a position that I feel is comfortable for labor. This experience has inspired me to get serious about giving them a written birth plan. And if they reject it, at least I tried.

Well after my wallet became $370 lighter (ouch!), I finally got released and able to work on Friday.

Never been so happy to return to work!

My mother wore this dress when she was pregnant with me. I wore it to church and a lot of people complimented me which totally surprised me. haha. Ramsey thinks it looks like a night gown. Well, it was such a special feeling looking down at my bump and knowing in 1984 my mother did the same thing in the same exact dress! It was a really special moment and gave me goosebumps.

Last week I felt the familiar symptoms of a Urinary Tract infection. I’ve had a few in the past but never while pregnant. I was really hoping I could escape this particular ailment during my pregnancy. Well, with one month left of pregnancy, I managed to get one. It was really starting to burn and I was afraid to let it go too far since I didn’t know the effect it could have on the baby. In the past I’ve been able to let the small ones resolve themselves by drinking lots of water and downing cranberry juice like crazy. Well, on Thursday morning, as I sat on the school’s toilet in pain, I prayed to Heavenly Father. Yes, on the toilet. A little shameful I know. I asked about whether it was necessary to go to the hospital or if the problem would resolve itself. I felt the prompting to get it checked out. I decided to skip my first two classes since it was too painful to sit. Surprisingly, my boss was supportive for once and I was on my way.

There are no taxis to be found anywhere near my school hence the reason I ride a scooter but I felt like I would be too uncomfortable to take it. So I waited for a while and finally came upon Shanghai’s equivalent of a tuk tuk. Bad idea, I hit so many potholes, I wonder how my baby survived. It was like Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride.

I arrived at my regular hospital and they sent me to a different doctor this time. I guess he’s the general doctor for the VIP unit. The man was so incredibly kind and patient with me as we explored my options. His English was also amazing. I wish he was my obstetrician!

He was a little afraid to give me a strong antibiotic because of my pregnant state but he also didn’t know how effective the one safe for pregnant woman would be since I’ve had several previous UTI’s. We finally agreed on the weak one and that I would come in on Saturday for a stronger one if I was still feeling symptoms since most of time, symptoms will be alleviated within 1-2 days of taking the antibiotic.

I ended up with 6 bottles that cost  70 yuan each ($11) and was directed to take one bottle a day. The bottles contained dissolveable powder in them that tasted a little bit like lemonade…if lemonade was left out in the sun for two days.

I took Thursday’s medicine and Friday’s medicine. Friday night, I’m in the most pain I’ve ever felt from a UTI. Wait! This isn’t supposed to happen. I understand that not all of the symptoms can be resolved so fast, but in the past, I’ve always felt pretty good by the second day. And for sure, it never got worst!

As I’m screaming in pain at the toilet, I start panicking. I really didn’t want to go to the doctor to get a stronger antibiotic. I didn’t want to risk hurting the baby. I didn’t want to throw away the other 4 bottles of weak antibiotic.

After returning from the bathroom in an episode of burning urine, Ramsey, after hearing the screams, asked if I wanted a priesthood blessing. I was just thinking the same thing.

In the blessing, Ramsey felt prompted to say that if I had enough faith, God would make my present antibiotic strong enough to kill the infection.

In my heart of hearts, I knew the antibiotic was not strong enough. I knew it as soon as the doctor offered it to me. After 5 urinary tract infections, I knew the first strand of antibiotic would be useless.

But when I heard these words, I felt comforted. All I needed was faith. And of course a mustard seed of faith is all I needed.

I went to bed comforted.

I woke up the next morning to use the toilet and relief! No pain! It was like a Christmas miracle. ;P

I was so grateful, I couldn’t wait to bend down on knees and thank my Heavenly Father.

I know I have been so blessed lately. Being blessed doesn’t mean everything will be smooth sailing. We are still given trials, otherwise, this life wouldn’t be much of a test, but God does answer our prayers. He will alleviate our burdens if we put our trust and faith in Him.

I also feel blessed concerning finding my new apartment. Somehow with my limited Chinese, Ramsey and I found the most perfect apartment for our present need. I was able to find the right real estate agent, communicate my needs effectively in a foreign language, and get an awesome landlord who is super nice and accommodating.

The price was exactly what we budgeted for. The size is perfect and the location is across the street from our old place.

We found the right one after just looking at the only two apartments available in the complex we wanted.

_____

In my string of 3rd trimester misfortunes, I developed a cough 3 days ago. Once again, I was given a trial. I coughed so hard I couldn’t sleep and choked on mucous. I didn’t want to take any medicine. But then miraculously, my boss who never has a sympathetic bone in her body, gave me the fieldtrip day off. (We were taking the kids to the museum). I slept most of the day and it was the kind of rest day I needed to bounce back and face my 40-hour work week.

And every time I feel this little baby kick, I smile. How am I so darn lucky (blessed) to have been able to get pregnant?

I can’t wait til I get to welcome our little baby in less than a month!

I am SO blessed.

Today I had my first glimpse of real pain…and I didn’t like it. Normally, working 40 hours a work has been relatively easy. Singing and dancing with the kids is a bit tiring but for the most part I’m happy to have the exercise and it gives me something to do. However, today during lunch the baby decided to move into a position low down in my pelvis which I had never experienced before. It felt like something was grinding into my pelvis bone. My pee burned and it also pressed on my sciatic nerve which felt like knives being thrust into my spine. I looked up at the clock. I saw that I had 20 minutes left before my next class. Could I do it? I was in so much pain I couldn’t breathe.

Then the flood gates opened.

I just cried. Right there in the office.

It felt so good.

It seems like these pregnancy hormones just make me want to cry all the time whether it be from frustration, pain, stress, or without reason. These past few weeks I have found myself crying at least once a day now. And it feels so amazing afterward. I’ve always felt very uncomfortable crying in the past and so usually restrained myself. But now, I’ve succumbed to just letting it happen. Whenever and wherever, and it’s the best stress release in the world.

So there I sat at my desk and I just let the tears trickle down and I buried myself in a tissue. My boss looked up at me. “Are you ok?” she asked. “I’m in a lot of pain right now.” I explained to her. She said, “Ok.” and kept working.

I don’t cry for the sympathy. I cry because I know that everything will be better if I just let it happen.

I prayed to Heavenly Father to take away the pain so I could finish my last 3 classes of the day. Then I put myself together and fixed my makeup and put on my game face. I had one minute left.

Through the kids enthusiasm and contagious smiles, I was able to get though the rest of the day. My pelvis and spine is still sore from the incident but thank goodness the baby moved! I just hope he/she doesn’t find that spot comfortable again.

I’m worried. What if these next 5 weeks continue to be painful? Oh let the time go by fast!

Here are some of my kindergarteners enjoying a fieldtrip at “Career Town.”

I have a new class. No, not to replace another but an additional class. My crazy boss thought it would be great to add a class to my schedule 7 weeks before my due date. Please, someone hand her “boss of the year” award. And the drum roll please….they are two-year olds! Yes, kindergarten age has somehow included 2-year olds. Do I have the energy to handle this class? Not really, so you’ll see I’m sitting and teaching. I have to preserve my energy so it can be distributed equally among all my classes.

Vish had her baby on March 17h. She is still in India and she’s been there her whole pregnancy. =( But she will be coming back in July and I’m definitely looking forward to it! It’s been a long year without my good friend Vish!

Here is a picture of her beautiful girl “Sanchitha”

How did I hear about Cali Burger? (The rip-off In-n-Out hamburger joint that hit Shanghai last month) Well, ironically enough, I heard about them through bad press. In the Los Angeles Times of all places in an article talking about In-N-Out trying to sue them). Of course that drew my attention. If In-N-Out is willing to sue a burger joint in a foreign country known for makings fakes of any and every product out there, then these burgers must be legit! I proceeded to view Cali Burger’s website. Under the News Press link, I couldn’t help but notice they were actually reposting the negative press themselves! And it totally makes sense! It’s the negative press that’s getting themselves heard! So in reality, they are making money by having negative press. If In-N-Out wanted them to go out of business, they simply had to stay quiet and soon it would disappear just like all the American food joints that on average last a year.

Ramsey headed over there for a date night Friday and were immediately impressed by the likeness of the restaurant. Lots of red and white decor complete with palm trees. I felt transported back to sunny California. My mouth was already salivating upon smelling the familiar scent of grilled onions. The baby kicked a few times to signify to it’s mother it too was hungry. (Seems to happen every time I smell something real good!)

The burger was indeed legit! The only thing it was missing was relish in the sauce. And it just wasn’t as tangy enough. Perhaps, that is the relish, but the rest of the burger was very close! The fries didn’t taste anything better than ol McDonalds style and the shakes (they only offered vanilla) tasted like soft serve shoved in a cup. But the burger! The burger was worth it!

It’s a little far from my apartment. Took about 20 minutes in a taxi but I heard they will soon be offering delivery. Well, in that case, I foresee much more Cali Burger in my future. =)